We were all raised to be prim and proper little girls. There were certain things you just didn't discuss in public, in particular, 'bodily functions.' Boys, they were a different animal (sorry, PC crowd, but it is just a fact of life). They loved----still love----'bathroom humor.' Nice little girls just didn't go there. And when we were in junior or senior high school, no way would we have ever talked to boys about having our period or even having cramps. 'Nice girls' kept that all private.
Even as newlyweds we didn't go around talking to our friends' husbands about private body issues. But then came the days of pregnancy, and everything changed. "My period is late!" became cause for coed group celebration. Going to childbirth classes really drew me out of my modesty. Here we were, young married couples, talking about every physiological in mixed couples---strangers!---and bodily functions became our primary topic of conversation. Talking about constipation no longer brought on consternation. Our bodies became open books.
My husband and I became close with another couple, Ken and JJ, in our Lamaze class. We became friends outside of the class, and we kept getting together after their son Eric was born just a week or so before our daughter was born. One day, a month or so in to the whole parenting realm, JJ called to talk to me but I was busy nursing my daughter. So JJ talked to my husband instead, and to this day we laugh about the fact that she was openly discussing her sore nipples with him and it didn't seem odd at all because we had discussed EVERYTHING together in our Lamaze classes. We lost track of Ken and JJ when our kids got in school, and I hear they divorced. But were we to run in to JJ today, trust me, I would not appreciate my husband discussing her nipples with her!
From changing diapers to potty training, young moms are always discussing 'pee and poo' even more often than playing 'peek a boo.' You think nothing of discussing color, frequency, amount, etc. When your toddler uses the potty chair instead of his or her pull-ups, you cheer wildly and call everyone you know to announce and discuss in detail this amazing accomplishment.
But as your children grow older, you don't really discuss all these things out loud when the neighbor kids come over or you are at a family gathering. No, it really all becomes hush-hush again. It's not that you pretend it doesn't happen, but what goes on in the bathroom stays in the bathroom and no longer becomes your favorite topic of conversation. It kind of goes underground again, and when I think about it, that is a pretty good analogy if I do say so myself.
Of my four grandchildren, the three-year-old is completely potty trained, the almost three-year-old is embroiled in the training right now, and the 19-month-old is working on it. (When I watch the baby and change her diapers, I think nothing of describing in detail for my son or daughter-in-law what I find in there, and they seem so interested!) Seeing my children's excitement as they potty train their children brings back lots of memories. I cheer out loud when my daughter calls me and excitedly proclaims that her son or daughter "just pooped in the potty!" When they are eight she won't be telling me, and I won't be cheering them on like this. This is just a very special time in life when you get back to celebrating bodily functions.
Being grandparents seems to coincide with us BVGs being in our 60's, and I don't know if it is coincidental or what, but for some reason when we women 'of a certain age' reach that 'certain age,' bathroom issues return to the forefront. In our case, it is all about the toilet, or rather the height and the shape of the toilet. And so it has been with Elltu, who as she approached the age of 60 could no longer tolerate her low, highly inadequate toilet. And quite honestly, she succumbed to 'Toilet Envy,' or to put it another way, she coveted my chair-height oval toilet. And so, with great love in our hearts for Elletu---and with the help of her friend Sandy and her daughter Deb---we decided the best gift we could possibly give her was a toilet just like mine. So we pooled our resources and started making plans to buy this wonderful thing for her. And then, just the day before I was to make the purchase, I received a text from her daughter telling me that, unbeknownst to any of us, Elletu had gone out and bought a new toilet herself!
Our creative juices had already been flowing as to how we could present her with the toilet at her birthday party, and then all our plans were dashed in one text. But alas, we regrouped, voted and decided to just give her the money to pay for the toilet she already bought. And when she was settled in the Queen Chair on our regular BVG night this past Wednesday, September 16, 2015 (a week after her actual birthday), we gathered around her, as 'The Royal Flush Singers,' and had this song to sing:
SKIP TO YOUR LOO, DEAR ELLETU
Elletu turned sixty, what should we do?
We could give her sixty dollars and a card too,
But what she really needs is a chair-height loo,
Skip to your loo, dear Elletu.
Loo, loo, skip to your loo,
Loo, loo, skip to your loo;
Loo, loo, skip to your loo,
Skip to your loo, dear Elletu.
******************************************
And then a poem, "Ode to the Royal Flush," explaining not only the gift of the money but also the other little gifts we had for her bathroom. So for Elletu's 60th birthday party we gave her a 'Bathroom Shower'! I'm not sure giving a friend a toilet for her birthday, or toilet bowl cleaner, or a new toilet bowl cleaning set, etc., is very common. But Elletu is an uncommonly awesome Sister, and nothing could make us happier than being part of this joint venture making her comfortable on her toilet! After all, TOILETS DO HAPPEN!
No comments:
Post a Comment